What contributes to being happy?

Disclaimer:

I am not a psychologist or a professional advisor. The ideas and insights shared here are based on my personal experiences, research, and reflections. What works for me may not work for everyone, so it’s always a good idea to explore what works best for you. If you’re seeking specific guidance or advice, I recommend consulting a professional. What if... we could break down happiness into bite-sized chunks? We all chase it, but how many of us actually understand what makes us happy? Is it about career success? Strong relationships? Good health? Or maybe it’s something deeper—finding balance and meaning in all areas of life. I started researching happiness, and, not surprisingly, I got very different answers.

Over the coming months, I’ll be exploring the many layers of happiness, because it’s not just about feeling good in one area. Real happiness is about aligning all the parts of your life—work, relationships, health, freedom, and personal growth (and many more) —in a way that makes sense for you. Short version: it's all about balancing all the aspects in life.

Think about it: how does your job shape your happiness? Is it just the paycheck, or does it also contribute to your sense of purpose and fulfillment? Can happiness in your work trickle into other parts of your life? And how about your relationships? Are they a source of joy, or do they add unnecessary stress? I’m sure you’re now thinking, 'How about both, Dimi?' and you’d be right. Also keep in mind "relationships" does not only mean romantically -also friendships, professional relationships and family are part of that. Those are all 'ships' that need your energy to maintain them - to keep them afloat.

Then, there’s health—the foundation of everything. If you’re not feeling physically well or mentally balanced, can you truly experience happiness in other areas? It’s easy to overlook, but your physical and mental health are deeply connected to your overall well-being.

And then there’s financial stability. The stress of money worries is one of the biggest barriers to happiness. But it’s not just about having money—it’s about creating the space and peace of mind to live the life you want. When you're not constantly bogged down by financial pressure, you have more room to focus on what truly matters. But, are those people really happier?

We've all been in touch with all these aspects in life - no my question is: which area contributed the most to your happiness? I bet it's hard to pick one, unless one of those areas is in really bad shape. Just take a minute to think about that: imagine that either you're really unhappy with your job, are in very bad health, have low quality relationships or you're really struggling financially - or even worse, a combination of those. No doubt about it, your happiness is affected.

So what's the goal - strive in all of them? Get the best job possible, work hard, earn a lot of money, get healthy and your relationships will follow? We'd like to think so, but I'm afraid the truth is not that simple.

What I've also learned is that different cultures have different approaches towards happiness. Now to be honest I've only explored some of them yet, but I'll keep digging. For example, the Japanese put less pressure on happiness then most Western cultures. In a podcast episode Dr. Laurie Santos (ph.D.) talks with Shigehiro Oishi (ph.D.) where he points out that in Japan it's ok to tell your conversation partner that not everything is fine, or what you're struggling with. By making it a default in the culture, they feel less pressure to be happy which gives people the necessary space to be unhappy and therefor also be able to face it and do something about it.

A happy man from Japan - (Photo by Victoriano Izquierdo on Unsplash)

In my personal opinion, I do feel that we, as a Western culture tend to constantly "fake it till we make it" when it comes to happiness. I've seen it in many countries I visited already: when somebody asks how you're doing you can just feel that you're expected to say that everything's good or even great. But I'm a strong believer that we shouldn't. When people ask me I tend to respond honestly: either "Could be better, I'm struggling a bit today" or "Yes, today is great - I'm enjoying the sun and I just signed a new client". By really giving it existence, in my mind it feels like a relief - because I'm not putting on a mask. I'm not saying to go pour your heart out every time someone you meet asks how you're doing - but go with your gut and to the right people just try to mention that not all is great - you don't even have to go to details but I'm sure you'll feel some relief by just saying it out loud and you can stop keeping up appearances. I'm also quite certain that person will be more understanding than you would initially expect.

To conclude this first article, I'd like to sum up what, in my opinion, could be the first steps in our pursuit of happiness:

• determine the areas where you're (un)happy

• accept them

• don't keep up appearances to your environment - just be real

Thanks for reading! Let me know what you think. Happiness is a journey, not a destination—let’s figure it out together :)